1/11/11--2pm--I call Rich (my former husband) to see if I can have the kids overnight (it was his night with them), seeing Austin clearly won't have school. I told him "I'm ok either way", and he must've really believed me, because he said he was going to take the day off, and was looking forward to spending the day with them. "Alright, I'll be ok...I'll paint, I'll write, I'll Skype...I'll be just fine", I say, half saying it to convince myself.
1/12/11--Full blown blizzard outside. I woke up, and couldn't see what time it was, so I turned my clock towards me, and still couldn't see what time it was. WAH! I lost power already! Luckily, my cell phone was fully charged. It's 6:30am. It's weird, but those four bars on my phone feel like my lifeline to the outside world. That and my laptop...oooh...no power. At least I will have about four hours of battery life on my laptop. The internet is another lifeline for me...I think I'll check my email. WHATTTT? No internet connection. "Breathe, Sandy...you'll be ok....you can Skype instead", I hear myself think. Skype is a new thing for me, and I looove it. I now Skype with my mom every morning, (83 years old,and lives 35 min. away) and it's so fun. I'm not sure how Skype works, but I don't think it's connected to electricity or the internet...I'm good to go! I have four hours of Skypability...this storm won't be so bad...I can do this.
6:32am--I turn my computer on, pull up Skype...WAH...nothing...nada...ghost town...not working!! Breathing. Ok, Sandy, do a quick review...no power, no Skype, no internet, no kids here... What DO you have...four bars on my cell phone, four hours of computer time... I'm hearing a loud thought in my head "RATION what you have!!!" ok, ok...I guess I'm going into survival mode...and I decide to go back to bed.
6:35am--Laying in bed, all kinds of weird thoughts go through my mind. Now, for those of you who know me, I'm realy not a worrier, (in fact, I teach others how NOT to worry!) but these are the panicky thoughts that dance in my head:
"What if I freeze?"
"What if something happens to me? When will they find me?" (and make a mental note to put on mascara and blush just in case...)
"What will I be able to eat today?"
"What if the water becomes contaminated, and the septic system backs up and leaks out of the faucet?"
"What will I do to fill my time??"
"I feel so disconnected to the world..."
"These thoughts are crazy...maybe hypothermia is starting to affect my mind." (even though it is pretty warm under my covers)
"Maybe I'll do a 'fast' today, sipping only on bottled water very slowly (because I have to ration it)."
Then I remember I can always talk to God.
"God, it's me and you today."
In response, I hear, "Sandy you were thinking of devoting one year of your life dedicated to me, and it's funny in just 5 minutes, you're wondering how you'll spend 1 day slightly disconnected from the world. I'm here for you...you're not alone."
God makes me smile...always does...and with that, I drift gently back to sleep...
I'm having a party. My sisters are there, my house looks so pretty, and my landscaper friend is also there, cutting down the huge branch that has been blocking my back door since the last storm. All the lights came back on... Life is good.
8:30am--I'm awakened by the ringing of my cell phone. Shoot! I can't see the time on my clock...wah...the lights coming back on was only my dream. It's my girlfriend Brunnie, calling to see if I am alright. I find myself sounding like a cavewoman: "OOGA! Can't talk! Rationing bars! Bye!" I'll explain to her later.
It's a little chilly here. I eat a bag of Pirate's Booty...so much for the fast. The thought occurs to me that I could possibly make some tea with my gas stove. Hmmm...doesn't light. I grab a lighter, put it up to the gas, and presto magico...tea's a coming! Honestly, the inner cavewoman is pretty proud that I am really roughing it and surviving! I decide to boil LOTS of hot water and put it in my thermal carafe. I'll need it, especially if I'm to survive on tea and Pirate's Booty. (thank God I bought the value pack of 8 mini bags!!) Actually, I guess I could cook now, with my gas stove, but I don't really want to keep opening the fridge, it may ruin all the steak and chicken I have yet to cook.
8:45am--I decide to put some music on and begin a new painting. As I'm setting up my supplies, I realize I can't play music...no power. Think, think, think...(I've always been a pretty resourceful thinker)...I could play a CD on my computer, but is that really worth using the battery life for? Nay nay. I really do like silence anyway.
Canvas and paints all set up, I'm ready to go. WAH...the picture I wanted to paint is on a file stored on my computer! Hmm...do I want to use my four hours for that? It will most likely take me longer than four hours...what to do...what to do...
I make another cup of tea and contemplate having another bag of Pirate's Booty. No, RATION them! Pace yourself girl! Taking stock once again of what I have...four bars...ooh phone's ringing again. It's my mom, wanting to know if I'm ok. Cavewoman comes out again, and I hear myself talking VERY quickly. "OOGA! Ya! Thanks! You? Four Bars! Bye!" I'll explain to her later too. I check my phone. Four bars. I'm still safe.
Phone rings again...a number I'm not familiar with. I debate whether or not to answer it...must be smart with my four bars. Aaah, it's someone wanting to make an appointment for a session. I hear Cavewoman wanting to blurt out, "OOGA! NO TALK! Four BARS!" But instead, I politely and kindly set the appointment..."Yes, I'm still at the same location. Yes, my fee is still the same." She's sharing how much she loved her last session with me. I'm feeling slight panic in my chest. "Yes, I'm looking forward to seeing you too. Thank you...see you soon!" Click. I check my phone. WHATTT....Three bars left! I feel like I just lost oxygen!
10:00am--I'm getting cold. I check the thermostat. It reads 62. That's a far cry from the balmy 72 I like to keep the house at. "Breathe..." I hear inside my head, "What's the worst thing that could happen?"
I think back to the blizzard of '78 when we were without power for days, but I was young then, and was with my whole family. It's very different when you're by yourself. My thoughts go to others who may not have a cell phone at all, or a gas stove to heat hot water to keep a little warmer. I say a silent prayer for them...and want to cry.
10:10am--I am calmed by the sight of the guy who is here to plow my driveway. It's still blizzard conditions, but I guess I could always go out to my car to get warm, and recharge my phone there too. Life is getting better...I can breathe easily again.
10:20am--I go out and shovel the walkway...ooh, it's really heavy snow, and I have a long path from the driveway to my house. I'm sweating by the end, because I am like a bull plowing through it. There is a sense of pride that I have when I'm done...oddly similar to the feeling of having a full tank of gas; having a good bowel movement; and teaching a great class! :)
11:00am--I decide to start this painting...and use up my four hours to see the picture I want to paint. Painting for me has become like taking a mini vacation. I first started painting a year and a half ago, when a relationship ended, and it was both therapeutic and such a wonderful way for creative energy to flow through me. I silently count my blessings... "Sandy, remember I am here for you," I hear in my head.
I smile...and I paint. Cavewoman and I want another cup of tea...and I eat another bag of Pirate's Booty...for energy, of course! :)
Painting makes my day go by...and I find that I am so much more relaxed, because my thoughts are focused on something that brings me joy! I notice that my fingers are really cold. I check the thermostat...ew...it's 60 degrees in the house, and I'm secretly wishing I had one of those funny looking "Snuggies" to wear as I paint! Cavewoman agrees...especially if it's a leopard print one! I smile, and keep painting.
The silence also offers me time to reflect. "What will be the first thing I do when the power comes back?" "What do I miss the most?" "What will I do tonite?" I decide...a nice hot shower, heat, and tonite by candlelight, I will write notes of gratitude to some very special people in my life. I love how that makes me feel.
12:00noon--For some reason, I'm craving cucumbers. I read in some woman's magazine that sliced cucumbers in water have a detoxing effect. (It truly is amazing the thoughts that can come to you when you have space for them in the silence...) So, I try it. Not bad...and I'll probably need the detox after all this Pirate's Booty.
1:00pm--Talked to the kids...they don't have power there either (they are only 7 minutes away.) Everyone's safe...all is well. Cavewoman is silent...I can talk all I want. And Austin said he's really, really bored!
1:10pm--Wow, the mail-lady just delivered my mail. How can she be out there driving in this blizzard?? She is instantly elevated to "hero status" in my mind.
2:00pm--Austin called...they just got power back there...he's a happy camper. I know it probably won't be long until we get it back here.
2:22pm--I open the refridgerator to get some cream for my coffee (it goes well with Pirate's Booty), and the LIGHT WAS ON! Power is back!! Wow, I can't believe it! I feel like I'm normal again! I am relieved. And for some reason, I'm also a little sad about it...like I'm cheating or something. I really wanted to write those notes by candlelight. I guess I still can.
What a day. I realize so many things:
I will always be ok no matter what.
I don't really need to put on blush or mascara "just in case".
I will still write those notes, even if my life gets busy again.
I don't think I want to see Pirate's Booty for a long time.
And I realize I have a fear of two things: being cold...and being hungry. Maybe I'll get a pet buffalo just in case.
Cavewoman likes that. "OOGA!"
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